makeup and me

makeup

A few years ago, I wouldn’t leave the house without makeup. A year before that, I’d never even wore makeup. Now I’m at a new point.

I’m comfortable not wearing makeup to work, walking Olive or going shopping. Basically any normal everyday tasks. But when it comes to social events or going somewhere new, all the products come out. Even though most of the time I’m out by myself and not there to impress anyone, I need to have a pretty face.

I don’t rely on it like I used too. Like I said, I wouldn’t go out without it, which wasted sooooo much time. Because I was new to it, I would spend hours trying to get the right eyeliner flick and eyebrow shape.

To be honest, I was concentrating on the wrong things because they weren’t all that bad. It was the foundation that was a crime. But I wouldn’t be human if I didn’t have an embarrassing makeup phase. I’m just happy I can say I’m better at it now (I think).

I know I’m by far not the only one who likes to have some makeup on to lift confidence. I just think it’s odd how I only need it for a confidence boost in certain situations.

I’m comfortable with my naked face, so why can’t I flaunt it all the time?

It’s rare that I even think about makeup when I’m getting ready for work. Maybe if I’m planning on taking some good ol’ selfies when I get home or if I’ve waxed my eyebrows too violently the day before and need to cover the redness, I’ll put some makeup on. Even then that’s 1 out of 4 weeks a month, at a push.

But as soon as I’m going somewhere new (like when I was in Prague, for example) my makeup is the first thing I do. The tables turn and I don’t even consider not wearing makeup. I’m like a zombie, just applying it without even thinking.

makeup

It’s crazy how I must subconsciously feel like I have to wear makeup when only going to certain places. To put into perspective of how silly it is, like I said I’m comfortable not wearing products on my face when going to work. But if I’m going shopping near to my work on the weekend, meaning I’ll be in the same area, have to get the same train, etc. I need to wear makeup.

Maybe it’s because it’s a different situation? Like, I’m comfortable at work now so I don’t need to have an extra layer of confidence. But who knows what could happen being out and about.

It’s as if I feel like I need to make a good impression to anyone and everyone who will see me that day. And I’ll admit, it’s ridiculous.

My bare face won’t make a good enough impression on total strangers that I’ll most likely never see again, so I have to paint it.

It’s something I need to change, somehow. Or maybe I don’t. If wearing cosmetics makes me feel good, then why shouldn’t I wear it?

I think the issue isn’t makeup itself, it’s the occasional reliance on it. I’m not going to stop wearing makeup – at least not for a very long time – because I like it. But I would like to stop that subconscious application of makeup when going out.

So it wasn’t that I need to wear it, just that I want to.

makeup

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